Our Baby Won’t Sleep: When She’s Too Attached to You



When She’s Too Attached to You He can’t nod off without you.

Whether you rock him or pat his back until he drifts off, your baby has become dependent on your presence to fall asleep.

Sleep solutions: Don’t abandon him entirely. Instead, gradually spend less time in his room each night and use a transitional object like a pacifier or a blankie to make the process easier. (Yes, pacifiers are okay at night — the new American Academy of Pediatrics’ guidelines actually recommend them.) However, a baby must be around 6 months old before he sleeps with a lovey — before that, anything loose in his crib increases the risk of SIDS. But you can start swaddling him with the blanket that will eventually become his lovey, says Dr. Tobin. If your baby gravitates toward his fuzzy lamb, incorporate it into his bedtime routine until he’s old enough to cuddle with it in his crib.

She’s struggling to give up co-sleeping.

You’re finally ready to reclaim your bedroom, but your mini roommate isn’t interested in her lonely crib. And the longer you’ve co-slept, the harder this process is going to be.

Sleep solutions: “This takes a while, so make the break gradually,” says Dr. Mindell. First, have her nap by herself; once she’s used to sleeping alone, do her bedtime routine in her room. Then move her crib into your room or put her down in her own room but continue to bring her into your bed if she wakes up during the night. If she doesn’t seem able to make the final transition to spending the whole night alone, you’ll have to let her fuss in her room for a while. But once she realizes you’re not coming to get her, she’ll learn to soothe herself.

You can’t stand to let her fuss.

Think about it: Do you fall asleep the minute you get into bed? Probably not. Well, neither does your baby. So when you burst into her room at the slightest whimper, you may be distracting her from falling asleep, or even waking her up.

Sleep solutions: Fight the urge to check on her for a few minutes. “If you don’t give your baby a chance to calm herself, she won’t learn to do it as quickly,” says Dr. Tobin. And if you’re glued to the baby monitor, just turn it down so that you only hear the major screaming — not the murmuring that babies naturally do in their sleep.

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5 Responses to “Our Baby Won’t Sleep: When She’s Too Attached to You”

  • Rodney Jackman:

    Talk about a nightmare, we just moved to a new house on Thursday
    and my husband lost his job on Monday. We have a ton of stress and
    our 5 month old used to sleep abt 4-5 hrs at a time, now he won’t
    sleep more than 90 minutes. We have been co-sleeping, should I move
    him to his crib? What do I do? I can’t stand the constant screaming
    anymore… and they baby crying is making me crazy too :) . Please
    help me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

  • Nathan Henry:

    My son was sick for a while with a hard dry cough, and now he is
    better. I am having such a hard time getting him to fall asleep now
    by his self..I tried everything and no luck. A night is even hard,
    he sleeps a few minutes and wakes back up. I fall asleep on the
    sofa with to get him back to sleep, and I get to tired ususally to
    wake back up, when I do anyway, so does he. HELP!

  • Jessie Bynum:

    My son is 10mo old and still wakes during the night 3-4 times a
    night! I cannot put my finger on it on why he keeps waking up!My
    son sleeps in our room but in his crib.Everyone has their own ideas
    and I feel like I am trying everything.Help!!

  • Edna Hunter:

    My son will be 6 months old in 5 days, he still wakes up two and
    three times a night. Does anyone have any suggestions on what to
    do, I thought that he would be sleeping through the night by
    now.

  • Leonard Cordero:

    My son is now 7 months and still doesnt sleep though the night.
    I still give him bottles even though the Dr. tells me that he
    should just drink water( middle of the nights), but what am I
    suppose to do I havent slept through the night since day one. I try
    to feed him baby foods but he will not eat more than 6 spoonfulls
    at the most and cereals forget it, the only way I can give him
    fruits and cereal are in his bottle and yes I did make homemade
    baby food but he won’t eat enough.

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